Mom-ing

For some time now, I have wrestled with the idea of having my own blog. I love the idea of crafting stories from my life as a mom, but I realize there are more "mom blogs" than most honest people can stand to read. Still, here I sit on a not so early summer morning while my kids sleep through their last day of tennis-swim camp. I am thinking about what exactly it takes to raise virtuous kids in today's world. Actually, I'm almost always thinking about something...how to raise patient kids, how to raise kids who are comfortable around dogs (well, *nice* dogs, at least), how to raise vegetable eaters, how to get through Sunday morning without any coffee until after church, how to raise boys, how to raise girls...you get the idea. I am, I have decided after 35 years of living, pensive. Even before the kids came along, I was not unfamiliar with being called intense or analytical.

This morning, I am stuck on the expressions I found upon my two older children when I picked them up from camp yesterday. They looked like a Florida sky right before it rains. So much energy, so still. John Andrew began first, "those two brothers...that's their grandmother over there...you need to talk to her, because her grandsons are very mean...they locked me out of the bathroom and told Kalina she was not a princess..." Then Kalina confirmed," yeah, they said I wasn't Princess Perfect and that they hate me(anyone who knows Kalina would not dispute her claim)." I checked with the camp counselors, and indeed all of this had transpired, and more, as I found out on the ride home. The counselor's replies were the same, "oh, those boys are mean to everyone." "they are even mean to me." "they're just that way."
This confounded me (and apparently my children). When did it become okay to raise mean spirited children? How can it be acceptable for a 7 and 5 year old to behave as if they were the "emperor with no clothes?" I submit that while I am far from a perfect mom, in our house, under my style of mom-ing, nobody is entitled to treat anyone unkindly simply because that is the way you are.

So, John Andrew and Kalina are sleeping in today, blissfully aware that they do not have to go back today, to confront the mean kids. Are they missing an opportunity to develop character? I hardly think so. I believe, instead, that the boys whose parents forgot to teach respect for their peers and elders, are missing an opportunity to learn from mine. My children, sadly, will have to face down more than their share of unkind children (and adults) before they learn to drive a car, but this is summer. We are on vacation. Today we are going to enjoy each other.